Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Please pray that maybe we have an answer...

It's been one week since we found out Andrew had died.  I still can't believe it.  I still don't want to.

I finally stopped hemorrhaging last night.  Not sure if it is because I was lying down or I am finally catching a break, so I'm going to wait it out a few hours of sitting up and moving around and see if it has truly stopped or will start up again.  The doctor actually called to check on me (surprise!) and also informed me that she re-read the pathology report.  In the "fine print" it says there was a POSSIBLE placenta issue, perivillous fibrin deposition, to be exact.  Yes, she read it to me thinking it would roll in one ear and out the other...but then, she doesn't know me very well, does she? :-)  This is actually promising to me because it is related to antiphospholipids, which was a test I had done before this pregnancy, which came back on the abnormal side.  My doctor spoke with a hematologist (blood doctor) who wasn't concerned with the numbers and they gave me the option of taking aspirin as a prophylaxis.  (Of course, this is also something that could have occurred during the few days that my son had died and him being delivered.)  Because of my stomach issues and tinnitus, I chose not to take aspirin since my doctor really didn't think it was necessary, just more of something that I could do to feel like I was doing something.  Now, I'm wishing I would have and maybe things would have been different after all.  In any case, I hope this at least starts us on the right path to having answers.  I know it sounds crazy to be thankful that there may be something wrong, but to have an answer and a reason, especially since Andrew checked out to be a perfectly healthy little boy...I need it so bad.  To all my prayer warriors out there, please pray that I will have answers...oh, and that the hemorrhaging has stopped and I won't need any further intervention.  I am so tired from all this, physically, mentally, emotionally...just a small break, that's all I'm asking.

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